Here and Now

by Jackson

Copyright © 2006

vamp_jackson@hotmail.com

Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Based on characters from Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series, created by Joss Whedon.
Distribution: The Mystic Muse: http://mysticmuse.net
Biteable: http://www.biteable.co.uk/jackson/home.html
All others, please ask first.
Feedback: Yes, please.
Spoilers: None.
Author's Notes: A sequel to A Guy Like You.
Pairing: Xander/Spike

I'm meant to be meeting him at 9, but I've been here for half an hour already. Just smoking and thinking. Looking at that door over the road, 'cos inside is my pet. Xander.

Talk about ironic. Peaches is never gonna let me live this down. Don't know how it happened. How I fell totally, arse over tit, in love with one of the Slayer's groupies. Must have been tryin' to kill him all those times. Bloody glad the Slayers so good at her job and I didn't manage it.

Xander. Xander is my boyfriend. I shiver every time I think of it, and it makes me wonder what the hell the universe is playing at. Here's me. Spike. Killer of Slayers, will kill again if I ever get this bloody chip out and I've got the most amazing reward in the whole fuckin' world, while Peaches is doin' his best to make up for his past and getting squat. Not that it bothers me, if the universe wants to throw me a break but it makes me wonder. If the reward is this good what the hell is the price going to be?

I think sometimes it's like a legend I heard once, think the poof told it to me actually, 'bout a thief who was punished by being taken to paradise, then sent back to Earth, and he was miserable for the rest of his life 'cos nothing could compare to paradise.

I suppose I'm thinking that when Xander dies that's going to be my punishment, what the fates don't know is the day that happens I'm going to take a walk in the rising sun. Bastards think they can play me. I'll show 'em.

But maybe they won't be that kind. Maybe he'll just dump me. He is mortal, maybe I'm just a phase of his or something and one day he'll be all, "hey sorry Spike it's been great but I want someone to grow old with and have family and a home with a fuckin' dog and stuff."

Thinking things like this drives me mad, but I'm not going to act like a bloody girl asking for words and promises. At the end of the day they're meaningless. The only thing that matters is I'm here and he keeps coming to me. No matter how much of a git I act sometimes.

So I'm standing here staring across, waiting for him, squeezing as much of Xander into my life as I can. Makin' the most of my paradise before I get sent back to Earth, and nothing and nobody has ever made me feel like this. Scared and happy and high and low all at once. He's making me better than I am, better than any demon has a right to be. And he loves me. Every time I realise that I feel like I've been punched in the gut. When he looks at me with those huge dark eyes a guy could get lost in, with that aching look that makes me want to fuck till we're both raw, and then hold him gently.

An' his mouth tastes sweet all sunshine and rain and pure things I'd forgotten ever existed and I get to touch him, put my scent all over him, be inside and have him inside and feel like I'm home for the first time in my life.

I don't tell him this stuff. Not in words anyway. Don't want to scare him by talking like a damn nancy boy.

It's 9 now and the door opens across the road and my heart kind of leaps into my mouth, and I watch him from under my lashes as he makes his way over. Pretending I haven't seen him yet.

Small stupid ways I try to stay in control, I'll show the fates I don't care.

He's standing next to me now. Touching close.

"Hey." He sounds all light hearted, bet he's not angsting like this. Oh well that's enough of acting like Angel for one night anyway.

I flick the smoke away. Xander is more addictive, and tastes better.

"Well well, what's a guy like you doing in a place like this?" I drawl.

"Looking for a guy like you." He's got that half smile thing going on again. Makes me want to throw him against the wall and fuck him into submission. I don't know what the hell plans we made for tonight, but I can tell you the only thing we'll be doing involves me, Xander, no clothes and a bed. Or a table. The floor at a push.

"You don't waste time. Like that about you."

"There's a lot about me you like."

"You got that right luv. Lets go. We're wasting time when we could be naked." Judging from the rush of pheromones coming from him I think he likes that idea. And I'm trying to stay cool and relaxed and inside I feel like I've swallowed lava. All burning and melting.

"You're so romantic Spike." He shakes his head in that I-should-be- pissed-off-but-I'm-too- horny, way.

We moving now, away from all the bloody people. Good, movement to an alone place means a naked Xander.

"You know me pet," I run my finger down his arm, and feel the shiver go through him. "Actions speak louder and all that, and I've got some actions that are going to blow you're mind . . .Such as it is."

"You know it's sweet talk like that that makes me wonder why I put up with you."

I shoot a quick glance around, nobody about. Good. I do what I've been waiting to do since he left this morning and pull him into my arms. Kissing his hot, sweet mouth. My Xander. MINE.

Eventually I pull back, the longer we stand here the longer it takes to get a shag.

"And it's sweet actions like that that remind you." I grin. I love it when he's speechless. Well not totally speechless. Shouting my name and various other words like "yes, fuck" and "please, more." Oh yeah that's the best.

He takes my hand and starts pulling me a bit quicker, and fuck it.

Here and now I'm with him. I'll worry about the price later.

The End

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