Giving It Away

"I got so much strength, I'm giving it away."

"Are you sure?"

"Will it help?"

"Much."

"Good."

I reached out my hands, palms up. Her fingers slid smoothly into mine, warm…silky, alive, as our hands found that comfortable position and our fingers gently grasped. Her green eyes sparkled as she smiled oh so warmly at me, like the sun on a clear July morning.

Her eyes closed and her face relaxed as she entered her well practiced meditation. I wasn't a stranger to meditation myself, so I knew the process to slide into that mental realm where focusing became almost effortless. Action followed thought as I drifted into the warm tingle of her hands. I opened myself, unconditionally trusting her and our bond. I drifted onto a warm sea of Willow. Soft, vibrant green alternating with waves of soft warm red flowed around and within me. The green caressed my skin with care, the red wrapped around my heart with the gentleness of a mothers caress. I immersed myself within her being. I opened a door within myself and willed golden energy like honey to flow into her green and red. All about, green and red grew brighter…warmer with brilliant golden highlights. I could hear the melding…like the imagined sound of butterfly wings. The warmth caressed me like hot fudge and the energy lifted me like the flight of Thor's hammer. Eternity passed as every sense in my body was brought to and beyond anything experienced before. Light exploded across my vision and with a cry of ultimate release I felt my body arch and fall back onto the bed. All sensation slowly ebbing to warm comforting bliss as my hands separated from Willow's.

Loud rushing breaths began to slow as I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to hold onto these exquisite sensations. Slowly the real world began to impinge itself on my senses supplanting the divine with the mundane. The joy and comfort of heaven replaced with the harshness of life. I had been to heaven again and brought back to earthly existence once more. But this time…this time it was ok. It was better than ok. I had the experience and now the delicious memory and it just made life a little bit better.

I heard a sigh and then realized it was me. Slowly opening my eyes I focused in on the caring features of my best friend. With a classic winsome Willow smile I could tell she was patiently waiting for me to speak, or at least to look like I could utter a coherent word.

I felt my lips curve into a comfortable smile just before I parted my lips and delicately moistened my upper lip with my tongue. I then pressed my lips together to spread the warm moisture as I prepared for my first words.

"Hi, you feeling any better?" I intended the question to be soft and caring but it came out somewhat husky.

"Much, thanks to you. When you give it away, you really give it away." The genuine warmth and feeling in her words and face brought a center of warmth to the middle of my chest that was indescribable.

"Well I couldn't have given that much away because I feel like I've been to heaven. So I'm pretty sure I screwed up and took instead of giving." My nature tried to make it sound flippant but it failed to mask my real concern as I noted the compassionate look on her face.

"Ahh Buffy, have you forgotten so soon? What you give out, you get back three fold." Her face took on a knowing grin.

"I thought that was just for bad stuff." I know my face crinkled, hate when it does that.

"Nope, if you give out good, you get back good three fold." She held up three fingers then brought them slowly to my face where she caressed my cheek.

"So I didn't screw it up?" God, did I just sound like a five year old?

"No Buffy. You did wonderful and I am all better for it." Her hand is still caressing my face etching warm, tingling paths.

"So that's why I feel like I just had the best sex of my life." Huh? I didn't just say that did I?

She smiled that cute, shy quirky one of hers. "Well, when you are rewarded for an unselfish act, it's usually what you need." Her voice was as soft as the fingers that were tracing slowly along my jaw line.

"I'm not complaining…but I can't believe there isn't something I needed more than a mind blowing orgasm." The words left my mouth before I even knew what they were.

Willow giggled, blushed then quickly composed herself.

"Think back on the experience; was it sexual gratification you received or something else where the physical release may have just been a by-product?"

I looked at Willow curiously. She knew something but wasn't telling. She wanted me to figure it out. She wanted me to say it. But what did she want me to say. I closed my eyes and brought the recent memory back. Replayed it slowly, letting the feeling flow through me again. I knew, and I smiled. Opening my eyes I responded softly.

"Love. I felt loved. Completely and unconditionally." The revelation spread like a fire from the center of my chest warming my entire body.

I look intensely into Willow's eyes and continued. "The love was from you."

I felt warm tears form in the corners of my eyes. The memory and realization were so intense I couldn't speak anymore.

"Yes Buffy, you felt my love for you. The connection we shared with your unselfish act prevented me from hiding from you my true feelings." Her hand was no longer moving, nor do her eyes move as they held mine steadfastly.

I felt the truth in her words and saw the love in her eyes. I reached my hand up to gently caress her cheek. Her eyes fluttered closed as she leaned into my palm.

"Then it's only fair that you now feel mine."

I leaned up and gently brought our lips together putting all my newly released love into a lover's caress.

The End