It's a Faith Thing by Jaho

Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Joss owns all. I'm just having fun and making no money.
Distribution: Forever Faith: http://mysticmuse.net/faith
The Mystic Muse: http://mysticmuse.net
All others, please ask first.
Feedback: Please!!! I thrive on it. It's the only joy that I get.
Pairing: Buffy/Faith

Faith and Buffy slammed the door to their hotel room, and both leaned against the door catching their breath. Here in New Orleans, at Mardis Gras it was totally nuts. They both took in a few deep breaths before straightening themselves and going their separate ways in their suite. Buffy went to the bathroom and Faith to the kitchen area.

"You know, sometimes this road trip thing isn't so bad." Faith called out as she reached into the refrigerator for a jug of orange juice.

"Yes it is!" Buffy yelled back from the bathroom, as she started the shower. "This totally sucks!"

"Oh come on. You can't tell me that you aren't totally getting off on having a little adventure outside of Sunnydale for a change…"

There was silence from the blonde Slayer, until she finally came out of the bathroom. Faith had gotten herself a glass of orange juice and added some Southern Comfort from the bar. One of the advantages of having a suite is a full bar, after all.

"Here, I made one for you…" the dark Slayer said as she slid the glass to the blonde.

Buffy smiled, still wrapped in a towel from her quick shower, and took the glass that Faith had prepared for her. She took a long drink, feeling the warmth of the alcohol slide down her throat into her stomach. She walked across the spacious, elaborately decorated room to the giant bed and sat down, leaning back against the headboard.

"Faithy...?" Buffy said, seeing Faith look up as she called to her. "Come sit by me…?" It was more a plea than a request. Buffy patted the spot next to her on the bed.

Faith gave her a mischievous grin and walked toward the bed, visually taking in the beautiful blonde that was in front of her. Buffy's hair was still wet and hung in strands sexily down across her shoulders. Droplets of water still beading on her skin, which was shown off by the lack anything but the large peach colored hotel towel that was wrapped around her.

Damn, B you are just the cutest thing, Faith thought as she made her way over and plopped down on the bed next to Buffy. "What's up girlfriend?" she said, giving Buffy a sly wink.

Buffy looked down into the glass in her lap. "I just wanted a little company." She said, moving her right hand to trace Faith's fingers lightly with her own.

"This was a cool idea you had." Faith told her. "The road trip and the hotel. It gives the rest of the gang a break from all the crap. Plus I really thought it was cool when the hotel manager kicked that foreign dignitary out of the Presidential Suite, just so we could have it."

Buffy smiled. "Yeah, that was neat. I guess saving someone's ass from a bloodthirsty vampire does have a few privileges." She took another sip of her drink, feeling the alcohol loosen her up a little more with each mouthful.

"So..." Buffy continued. "I know we haven't talked about it. But that first night you came back, when you showed up on my doorstep with Willow after you got out of prison…?"

"You…I mean…when I said hello to you and hugged you…I kinda thought you were about to…you were gonna…"

Buffy blushed from head to toe. Aw, she's so cute when she's embarrassed, Faith said to herself as she grinned.

Faith interrupted. "If this talk is heading down that lane, I need something a bit stronger than this." Motioning to her drink, she got up and crossed the room to the bar again. Then, dumping out the mixed drink she grabbed the bottle of Southern Comfort and a small shot glass that was on the bar top.

Faith walked back over to the bed, filling the shot glass as she went. She put the bottle on the nightstand and sat back down on the King Sized bed, next to Buffy.

"Hold on." Faith downed the shot in one gulp, feeling it burn her throat on the way down to settle in her stomach. She shook her head lightly and shivered for a moment shaking off the initial 'ickies' of the alcohol. "…okay."

"So you were saying?" Buffy took another sip of her drink, watching Faith refill her shot glass and then rest it on her thigh.

"Before I answer that, B…I have a question of my own. It's just a yes or no question and any way you wanna answer, I promise I won't blame you, ok?"

Faith looked down for a few seconds then directly into Buffy's eyes. "Do you still hate me?"

Buffy saw something in the dark Slayer's eyes that she didn't remember ever seeing before. Fear. Faith was actually afraid. Not of Buffy but of what Buffy might say to her. Then it dawned on her. She actually cared about what Buffy thought of her. It was something that Buffy was totally unprepared for.

Buffy looked away from Faith and shrugged. "I dunno…a little bit, sometimes." She began. Faith winced when she heard that.

"But then, other times…" Buffy continued "Sometimes I don't think that I ever did. I just…you hurt me Faith. You hurt me a lot. I always wanted to be your friend, and I felt like you kept pushing me away."

"I did push you away." Faith said, her voice filled with sorrow. "It was the only thing I knew how to do, and I am so sorry B."

"Look, I know that you've changed a lot. But I'm still trying to figure out how much I can trust you. I don't know if I ever hated you, Faith. Maybe I was just so hurt that I was just lashing out at you. Even when I came to L.A., the first thing I thought about was kicking your ass. But when I finally had you alone on the roof, what I actually did was help you get away from the Watcher's Council instead of beating on you. I…I've always seen the good in you Faith, always. Now I'm so glad to see that good part has grown."

"Angel helped me." Faith told her. "He helped me a lot. I was so screwed up, in some nasty ass downward spiral that led nowhere. But he knew what it was like, and he made me see how far down I'd gone." She looked up again at Buffy who was now looking at her with the sweetest, most understanding face. Faith slammed down the shot that she was currently holding and then refilled the small glass from the bottle, holding it ready for the next time she wanted it.

"I know." Buffy said, taking another sip of her drink and then looking over at Faith. "Could I have that one?" Faith looked over to see Buffy motioning to the shot glass. Faith smiled.

"Sure." Handing it to Buffy and watching her down the shot then wince in slight pain that was punctuated with a resounding "Bleeech…" Faith laughed as Buffy handed the shot glass back to her.

"Cool." Faith smiled. A real smile. At that moment Buffy felt it, her heart skipped a beat when Faith smiled at her.

"Okay, so then you were gonna kiss me…because…?" Buffy switched back to the original subject, causing Faith to look down again.

"Oh…yeah. Well, I guess it was because…" Faith hesitated and then screwed up her courage. "…I want you, B. I always have."

"Oh yeah, always. Ever since I first met you, that night at the Bronze. From the time I first saw you, I thought to myself: `Self, that's a girl you could really get comfy with.' "

Faith smiled slightly. "Yeah, I guess it was never that much of a secret that I swing both ways. Actually, I'll swing any way that my hormones take me, sometimes."

Buffy looked at her with an expression of total horror, and Faith just grinned. "Geez, B. I'm kidding. You're so serious all the time." Faith slapped her playfully on the shoulder.

"Oh sure." Faith said, refilling the small glass and handing it to Buffy, who brought it to her lips and drained it in a single gulp.

Faith leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "Totally cute. Why do you think I hated Angel enough to try and kill him? He had you and I didn't."

Because of the slight intoxication Faith was opening up more than she normally would.

"But, I didn't know what I was doing." Faith continued. "When I got to know him, he was so much more than I thought. He believed in me, and helped me through a dark time. I know why you loved him so much. He's a really good man…err vampire…or soul having…guy. Fuck it, I'm babbling."

Buffy smiled, thinking back to the time that Faith was speaking of. Faith was jealous? Is that what it was all about? Faith had wanted her? Too much. Too many of her own feelings toward the raven-haired beauty that were unresolved.

Without even realizing what she was doing Buffy leaned forward and kissed Faith fully on the lips. Faith hesitated for a moment but immediately relaxed into the kiss, exploring Buffy's mouth with her own.

"I love you, B…" Faith whispered in one of the moments that their mouths were not intertwined.

Buffy only nodded. Faith tried to look away but Buffy moved her hand to the side of her face to keep the gaze between them steady. "Faith look at me. Do you love me?"

Faith could hear her heart beating in her ears. What could she say other than the truth?

"Y-yes. I guess I do. Please don't freak out on me, okay B? Because that kiss was wicked!"

"So this wouldn't just be another `want, take, have' kinda deal? You really…? Wow…and I've never kissed a girl before, just so you know. Before just now, that is."

Faith smiled. "I know it's weird, considering all we've been through. But I've always felt this THING, ya know? I think it's because we're both Slayers. You know how we can sense each other sometimes? Well, if I really concentrate, I'm happy when you're happy and if you're sad so am I. It's like the Slayer bloodline has us…"

"Connected." Buffy finished, knowing exactly what Faith was talking about. She felt it too sometimes, their Slayer connection.

They looked at each other for a long moment, just drinking each other's features into their memories. After a while Faith looked down and slammed the shot that she held in her hand, then looked back at Buffy. So beautiful, she thought. So perfect.

"Yes, I love you B. That scares me more than anything that I've ever faced, more than prison, more than Kakistos. I…it's just that…"

"Shh." Buffy silenced her putting a finger to her lips and pulling her close, looking into her eyes. "I think I get it. I get it… because I kinda feel it too. The connection."

Faith looked deep into her eyes, and she knew that what she was hearing was the truth. Tears welled up in her eyes and one began to slip down her cheek. Buffy leaned in quickly and kissed the spot, drinking the tear and tasting its saltiness, hearing Faith moan at the contact.

"I've never been with a woman, Faith. But, I've thought about it a few times." She hesitated. "Help me through it?"

Faith looked at her in awe, not believing what she had just been asked. "I…um…"

With that little bit of encouragement, Faith was on her pressing their lips together passionately. Buffy felt her body let go and all inhibitions fall away. What she had told Faith was true. She'd never been with a woman or thought about being a lesbian. But this was a totally different story. The connection that they shared was stronger than whether they were male or female.

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It's a Faith Thing

by Jaho

Copyright © 2003

cpeace1@tampabay.rr.com