Helping the Not-So-Helpless

by Dan Knight

Copyright © 2003

itsmedan1975@aol.com

Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Faith does not belong to me. She is the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, The WB, UPN and some other people and companies that aren't me. Batwoman is owned by DC Comics, Warner Brothers and others who aren't me. Batman was created by Bob Kane and is owned by Warner Brothers and other people who aren't me. This story was made for the entertainment of fellow Buffy and/or DC Comics fans and I assure you I am not making a dime off of this story. So please don't sue me. I am a good boy, really
Distribution: Dan Knight's Fan Fiction Archive: http://danknight.gossimer.net/
The Mystic Muse: http://mysticmuse.net
I would appreciate if anyone asked first. Not because I am picky about who shows it, but I would like to actually see where it is going.
Feedback: Are you kidding? Of course I want feedback. Good, bad, indifferent, bring it on!
Spoilers: This story is set after season 7 of Buffy, I hope no one still hasn't seen the final season of Buffy by this point though. This story is set midway through the DC Comic Book series "52". But even if you don't read comic books at all you should be able to follow it ok. Although I highly recommend reading “52” but that is just me.
Distribution: Any archives for the various groups and list I post on are welcome to have it. Everyone else I would appreciate it if you ask first, but I am sure I will say yes. I just like to know where my stuff is going.
Author's Note: Special Thanks to Electronis Zappa both for beta reading and coming up with the title.
Pairing: Faith/Other

Summary: Faith discovers being mistaken for a damsel in distress can have it's advantages.

Muggers, they were something Faith hadn't run into that often in her patrols before she came to Gotham City.

Sure, every once in a while she would come across a mugger while patrolling. In fact, when she and Buffy started the Slayer School a couple of years back the students who had started patrols used to brag about it. "I caught a mugger last night!" they would boast.

It wasn't that they were especially impressive opponents. As one would expect, compared to vampires and the occasional demon a human mugger was not at all hard to apprehend. The only real challenge was making sure you held back enough to keep from leaving them in traction. Most thugs who would prey on an innocent in an alley probably deserved to never walk again; but Slayers weren't in the business of crippling and killing humans.

However, after what seemed like endless nights of roaming the streets in the dark and taking down one vampire after another, stopping a thug or two was one of the few ways to break the monotony of it all. Well, dieing usually worked too, but no slayer was ever bored enough for that to look like a good idea. Well, except for Buffy.

With that in mind, Faith wasn't sure what it was that caused the Neanderthal behind her, one of the three muggers she had just encountered, to actually manage to nail her in the back of the head. As she dropped to one knee Faith figured that it had been too long since she kicked some good old soul carrying human butt. That or she was getting slow in her old-for-a-slayer age.

Either way, as the brute in front of Faith started to aim a punch at her face, the slayer readied herself to get back to her feet and make all three of them very sorry for their buddy's lucky shot.

However, right as she was about to begin the hurting, Faith heard the idiot in front of her start to scream. Being cocky like she usually was, Faith initially thought his reaction was in fear for what she was about to do to him.

It was then that she noticed a small metal object sticking out of his hand. Even with her keen eyesight it still took the brunette a second to notice it was in the shape of a bat.

"No way!" Faith thought to herself, "He's actually here!" For a moment the Slayer actually began to feel giddy. It was an unusual feeling for her, especially when sex wasn't involved. Still, she had heard the reports of Batman missing for the last six months. She was more than a little disappointed that after being assigned to protect Gotham by the new council one of her heroes, one of the few cool super heroes at that, seemed to be AWOL. But here he was, Batman!

Suddenly Faith noticed the hoodlum that had been behind her go flying into a nearby wall. "Damn!" She thought, "He just laid the smackdown and I missed it!"

Faith then thought for another second, "Hmm…I wonder if he would be mad if I asked for his autograph?"

"Get down miss!" A voice shouted. In her initial star struck state it took the dark slayer a second to realize the voice calling out to her was a female's.

"That's not Batman!" Faith thought to herself.

As if to answer her, a very feminine form jumped over her and leaped at the one still capacitated robber. The slayer watched the woman as she leapt for the hoodlum in front of her. The super heroine was decked out in a skin tight bat suit that looked similar to Batman's but clung to the heroine's very athletic and shapely form in all the right places.

The slayer watched as the redheaded crime fighter began to engage in combat with her opponent. She easily and expertly dispatched of the last goon with some moves that even a slayer couldn't help but admire. All with her back to Faith, this gave her a very nice look at the heroine's backside in the process.

"That is most definitely not Batman!" She thought to herself while admiring the view. After striking the final blow the heroine turned around facing faith.

"Wow! And who are you?" Faith asked admirably. She was always one to appreciate a good butt kicking, especially when it was done by such a sexy butt kicker.

"I'm Batwoman!" The redhead said as she walked up to Faith and put a hand on her arm. "Relax miss you're safe now. Are you all right?"

'What?' Faith thought to herself. 'Am I ok? I'm a slayer, of course I'm ok! I should be asking miss wanna-be-bat babe if she's ok.'

"It's all right! They'll be out for a while. The police should be here soon." Batwoman continued explaining to Faith.

'She thinks I'm the victim!' The slayer thought, offended. She was Faith, she was the ass kicking dark slayer with the mad fighting skills. Faith started to point to the real victim, the girl she had rushed to save at the start of all this. Then she noticed for the first time the scared girl had apparently taken off.

'Great. Little miss roam the dark alley at night ran away and now Batwoman thinks I'm the victim' Faith thought again. 'I've never been so insulted'

Right as the slayer was about to set the record straight she noticed something. She got a closer look and suddenly realized the way that the other woman was looking at her. It was a look she knew all too well. Usually it was one she saw on men but there had been times, too few by Faith's count, where she had seen the fairer sex look at her the way Batwoman currently was. The slayer also noticed the super heroines hand, or rather the fact it was still resting on Faith's arm.

'Holy shit! This woman's checking me out.' Faith thought to herself, amused.

"Miss, are you all right?" Batwoman asked again, apparently noticing the woman she believed to have just rescued had suddenly gotten quiet.

"No…I'm fine." The brunette answered, as she briefly looked the other woman up and down. Faith suddenly realized Batwoman's thinking she was just an innocent victim could have its advantages. She smiled to herself as a wicked scheme entered her brain. She may not have gotten to finish off the bad guys, but she was starting to think she might be getting laid before the night was over.

"It's just…. I mean…." Faith answered, doing her best job at giving an impression of a scared innocent victim. It wasn't that hard for her, actually, she just did her best impression of Willow's high school days. "You…you saved my life." She finally answered putting her hand appreciatively on Batwoman's arm. And as much as the redhead tried to look composed Faith could still see the other woman reacting to her touch.

"That's all right. Don't worry, the police are almost here." she answered.

Faith suddenly processed what her 'rescuer' had just said. Willow may have used her computer mumbo jumbo to clean out Faith's record after The First was defeated, but meeting the police still wasn't high on the ex-cons to-do list.

"You'll be fine." Batwoman answered, as she readied her grappling hook and prepared to take off.

"Wait!" Faith called, stopping Batwoman's exit. "I mean…" the slayer continued now putting back on her fake frightened face. "Please don't leave me alone. I'm scared. Can't you take me away from them…please!" She asked, putting on a pout that she figured would melt anyone.

Batwoman stopped for a second as if thinking before looking back at the younger woman. "All right, I'll take you down the alley. These men already have records, they won't need a witness to put them away."

Batwoman then shot out her grappling hook and braced it, "Hold on!" She ordered and true to her request Faith wrapped her arms around her and nestled in good and close, resting her head on the other woman's ample breast. Faith could hear the heroines heart beating faster as she did.


After a couple swings Batwoman dropped the two of them onto a small rooftop. She was impressed, most women who got a ride like she had just given Faith would have let out at least some kind of a scream.

"You should be all right here." The redhead told Faith, before retracting her hook and reluctantly releasing Faith from her arms. "Stay out of dark alleys." She told Faith as she turned to make her exit.

"Wait!" the brunette called, "I mean…do you have to go?"

"You saved my life!" Faith continued, as she moved in closer to the redhead closing the distance between them. "There must be…" Faith then moved in even closer, standing well in Batwoman's personal space as she tilted her head to the side, "…'something' I can do to repay you."

"Just…knowing you're safe is enough." Batwoman answered, trying her best to remain poised and calm. This was proving hard to do with the incredibly sexy brunette so close Batwoman could feel the other woman's breath on her lips.

"You sure?" Faith continued, "I mean…I was so scared. And you risked your life to save me. Surely there is some way I could say thanks." Faith continued before slowly moving in to kiss the redhead.

Batwoman tried to step back. She really did. But in the beautiful young woman's presence she was finding herself mesmerized as the brunette leaned in and their lips met. At fist the redhead just stood there as Faith kissed her but it wasn't long before she found herself kissing back, then slowly the super hero's hands found their way to the shorter woman's hips.

They kissed for a what was probably only a few seconds but seemed so much longer, yet still not long enough before Batwoman realized what she was doing and pulling back and releasing the kiss.

The heroine knew this wasn't right, to her Faith was an innocent younger woman who she had just saved. Never mind the fact Faith was anything but innocent, and probably had more experience in her younger years then the super heroine before her would ever catch up with before she died.

To Batwoman, doing anything with Faith would be taking advantage of a young woman's gratitude, even if she was sexy and wearing leather pants that she must have poured herself into before going out. And while she couldn't deny she had fantasies of just this thing happening about a hundred times since taking up the cowl. However, Batwoman knew that acting on that desire wasn't right.

"There is no need to thank me miss…"

"Faith." The slayer answered.

"Faith, I was only helping out someone in trouble. Just get back safe. That will be thanks enough." Batwoman finished, she then let loose her grappling hook and took one last glance before reluctantly swinging away. She knew when she got home she was definitely going to wonder how she was able to walk away from this woman.


"Ok, this sucks!" Faith muttered, as she watched the super heroine swing away. "I get in a fight and get all worked up. I don't get to actually finish off anyone, then little miss bat-babe shows up and gets me more worked up, then she leaves."

Faith turned around as she jumped onto the fire escape and began making her way off of the roof. "I am so going to need a majorly long cold shower."

As Faith began heading back home she realized she should have known that the innocent act wasn't going to get her any. Good girls never fall for the 'thank you sex' ploy, they're always too noble. She should have seen that.

After all, it didn't work all those years ago when she tried it on Buffy either.

The End

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