Making Plans by CN Winters

Disclaimer: Mr. Whedon owns these characters. I'm just borrowing them for a little while.

Summary: 10 years has passed since Willow outted herself to her friends and a desperate situation leads to a not so unexpected discovery for Willow and Buffy. This tale chronicles their first night together and 'the morning after' from Buffy's perceptions.

For the first time in my life I'm making plans. How did this happen? And why is it starting to scare the hell out of me?

And how did I end up here? In her bed? In her arms? I want to stay and watch her sleeping but I've gotta leave. I've gotta get out of here. But go where? Home? I am home. Something inside, something I don't understand, tells me to run…as far and as fast as I can. But why do my fingertips brush her cheek even as I pull the covers to make my escape? None of this makes any sense. Not how I got here. Not how I want to stay and leave all at once. None of it.

I look to the clock and see we've only been asleep a few hours but I'm fully awake. I couldn't be more awake even if I was on a double mocha cappuccino high. Willow likes cappuccinos. I feel a sappy grin come to my face.

Okay Buffy shake it off. You need to deal here and deal quick. She'll be awake soon. I always figured it was just part of the Slayer skills I had – the fact I was so in tune with her. I could read her from across a room without saying a word. I could feel her rise in the morning or when she finally fell asleep at night. But I know now it's something more, much more and as Giles might say it 'scares the bloody hell' out of me.

Giles…what would he say if he knew about last night? And Xander? And Dawn? Oh god, I'll have to tell Dawn. Sure she accepts Willow and loves her in a surrogate motherly/sisterly way for years now but how would she handle 'us'? I mean me with Willow? Together? A couple? How will she handle the fact that Willow and I are…are…lovers? How will all of them handle it? Why am I rambling in my head when I should be leaving?

I slip from the bed and go to my room. I don my robe when I hear the front door open and rush down stairs.

Dawn starts to grin. "Well I used to call this place home and today is laundry day but I can take my dirty clothes elsewhere-."

"No harm, no foul," she grins and walks back to the utility room. I look back up to the bedroom briefly before following her. I stand in the utility doorway as I watch her start the washer.

"So who'ya hidin' upstairs?" Her cat that ate the canary grin unnerves me as she totally ignores the question.

Dawn starts to chuckle as she loads in her clothes. "Oh I don't know? It's 10 am. You're still in bed. You don't seem to want me in the house. And you've got wild sex hair."

My hand shoots up to my head and I start to comb with my fingers. "I do not," I reply self-consciously.

"Uh huh," she nods, but knowing otherwise. "It's not another vampire, is it?" she asked. "Please say it's not another vampire."

"Good," she grins. I watch her close the lid and take a seat on top of the washer. "So tell me. Who is he?"

Okay, what do I do here? Do I lie and tell her she's imagining things? Do I tell her that there is someone but just not mention who? Or do I just blurt it right out?

"I'm telling you Dawn. There is no him. Okay?" Good answer. Honest. Okay, well, not so honest but not a complete lie either.

Dawn gives me a shrug. "Okay. So if I go upstairs I won't find some beefcake stud in your bed."

Dawn hops off the washer and starts to separate the clothes in her other bag. I know I've got to tell her the truth. I've got to say something. "Can I ask you a question?" I begin.

"You mean Mamma Willow, kinda like Daddy Warbucks? The one who's paying my way through grad school?"

"I love Willow, Buff. You know that. Why are you ask-?" I watch her stop sorting. She looks up at me as her jaw starts to drop and I have to look away. "Oh…my…god…You didn't!…Oh my god you did!" Dawn tackles me into a hug and I can't help but grin in reaction. "This is so cool! And about damn time!"

Dawn pauses a moment in thought. "Her bed? You mean you went to her? Gee we'll have to give you a new title – Buffy: the Wicca Seductress." She starts to chuckle but I can't join in and she senses it. "So what's the problem? Not as much as you expected?"

What a loaded question that is. "Well no, actually. It was more than I expected… which is what worries me."

"Worries? Buffy what do you have to be worried about? This is wonderful. Willow is a great person and you spent years trying to find someone that's…you know…on your level in someway and…now don't take offense…someone who's you know…normal. Just forget the fact she makes over a quarter million a year, has a kick ass car and a gorgeous, cutie smile," Dawn starts to grin again and yet again I can't join in. "Come on Buffy….What's the matter?"

"I'm not sure…I was lying in bed after I woke up - just watching her…and I started to think…things."

"Like what we're going to do for the holidays. I mean, I do the Christmas thing and she does the Hanukkah thing."

"Buffy, we do the same thing we've done every year for the last ten years. We put up the menorah and the Christmas tree. We make dreidels for the kids at the synagogue and take food down to the homeless shelter for Christmas dinner. I'm failing to see the problem here?"

"Yeah well what about summer vacation?" I tell her. "I'm already thinking about where we could go. I was thinking about driving up to San Francisco with her, up the coast."

"Yeah, well, what about life…like life insurance and health insurance? I mean is she going to take care of those things and what if something happens to me. Will she get the house? Do I get an attorney? Or should I just sign half of it over now?"

"Buffy, slow down," Dawn chuckles. "Breathe, okay?" I give her a nod and take her advice. "Jesus you just spent your first night together. Wait until the sheets get cold to worry about that kind of stuff," she adds sarcastically. The girl's spent too many years around the scoobies and it shows.

"Then again, I used to live in this house. I don't think Willow's sheets ever got cold," she adds with a chuckle.

"Look, I'm not sure how to say this…I love Willow. When you died, she and Tara were the only family I had left. Yeah Xander was around but…they took care of me. They always made sure I had food. They always made sure I had clean clothes and warm place to sleep. Willow even started to sell off her computer stuff when money was getting tight. And Tara did Card readings at the magic shop and you know how she got around strangers. All shy and jittery. It was hell for her but she did it…for all of us…me too. And I have to admit, none of the girls that Willow's met since then would have done the same. They all seemed…I don't know…shallow…None of them compared to Tara. Not until now…Can I ask you something?" I nod. "Do you love her Buffy? I mean really love her?"

"Then don't worry about the other stuff. As long as you love her it will work itself out."

"Since I decided I'm going to spend the rest of my life going to college," she sighed.

That made me chuckle. "It won't be that much longer…Dr. Summers…It's has a nice ring to it you know?"

We hear a voice calling asking if anyone was home. I recognize it in an instant. It's Xander.

"Look Dawnie, let's keep this to ourselves," I whisper to Dawn. "I'm not ready to say anything yet okay?"

"I'm failing my racism and stereotypes class," Dawn says, looking over my shoulder to address Xander. "She's not sure how to break it to Willow."

I give Dawn a small grin. "But she's promised to pick her grades up by mid-term. Right young lady?" I add waving my finger at her. Quickly I turn back to Xander. "So what brings you out this early?"

"Things got pretty wild at the Red Oyster. Just wondered if the 'show went on' after I drop you two off last night," he teases, wiggling his eyebrows.

I stiffen immediately but almost as quickly I push it back down. "In ways you can't imagine," I grin. Yet again it wasn't a lie but it wasn't exactly the truth or a forthright confession. Besides, I'm sure Xander could imagine all kinds of things. Most of which I did last night. "If you'll excuse me I'm gonna head up stairs and get ready for the day. Juice is in the fridge," I add as I walk toward the living room. I hear Xander and Dawn start to talk and I pause at the landing. Okay I can do this. I can go back up there.

I make my way upstairs and I peer into Willow's room. As I open the door she stirs and reaches over. I can't help but grin as I watch her reaching for me. Slowly she opens her eyes and I make my way over to stand at the side of the bed.

"Getting an early start?" she grins. She rises and comes to knell at the edge of the bed. As she does, the covers slip away to reveal her naked body. I have to catch my breath. It feels like I'm in a trance, hypnotized or something. I can't move. I can only watch as she pulls the sash loose on my robe, letting it fall open. I close my eyes and I remember. I remember what happened last night.

I asked her to show me how much she loved me. The grin she wore melted me to my center. She didn't say a word. I watched as she took off her socks first, tossing them aside. Next came the buttons of her jeans and a pool of denim on her floor. Her shirt covered her torso, ending just at the top of her thighs.

"Are you okay?" she asked me as she started to undo the buttons of her blouse from bottom to top.

I couldn't find my voice. I couldn't believe my eyes. The only touch of reality I still seemed to feel was the growing wetness between my legs. I waited anxiously for the shirt to slip past her shoulders but she kept it in place. She was totally nude underneath and I found myself licking my lips. She returned to me and placed her arms lazily on my shoulders, her fingers intertwining behind my neck.

"If it's too much too soon Buf, I won't hold it against you if you want to stop at any point. Okay?"

Stop? Why would I want to stop? I've waited years for this. I've waited years for you. Of course nothing that romantic passed my lips. I could only mutter, "I don't want to stop."

She grinned and with the lightest touch I ever felt she lifted my head back. I felt her tongue start at the base of my throat and travel all the way up until she placed a kiss on my chin. "Good," she whispered. "Because I really want to show you."

My head floated as I felt the butterfly kisses cover my neck and earlobe. I'd never been kissed so soft yet so thoroughly in my lifetime. I moaned. I know I moaned. I felt the rumble within myself and the growing wetness as a result. Suddenly I felt a chill and I opened my eyes. My blouse was gone. At some point she took it off. I was far too wrapped up in her lips to feel the garment freed from my body.

She walked around behind me, her fingertips making a lazy trail across my bust line as she moved behind me. She gently pushed my hair to one side and started to kiss the top of my spine and back.

Next I felt her hands start at my waistband and work their way up and over my back and down my arms as my bra joined my blouse on the floor. When her hands came back up she took a path up my stomach, across my ribs and to my nipples that instantly hardened. She pulled me tighter against her, and leaned her head over to whisper in my hair.

I couldn't speak. I couldn't reply. All I could do was issue a moan. Suddenly my jeans were feeling way too restrictive and I reached for the buttons in haste. I heard a light chuckle behind me and I felt her hands cover mine.

Her laugh was deeper and I felt her turn me back around. She examined my body. I felt naked before her. But instead of running or wanting to cover up I felt myself wanting to share everything.

I couldn't handle it anymore. I couldn’t play the passive. I took her shirt by the collar and pulled it down but I refused to let it drop. Instead I used it to snare her back and bring her into me. The kiss felt like an explosion. Her arms were trapped and I had her. I wanted her and she wanted me. I could tell. I could smell her arousal. I could feel her taunt nipples pressing into my own. I wanted to take her. Slow and easy wasn't enough. I had to have her.

I broke away from her lips and started to kiss her earlobe. "I want you Will," I told her. "Let me take you. God please let me take you."

Apparently Willow wasn't the only one in the room who could leave a woman speechless. She groaned, trying to catch her breath. "Give me your hand," she finally said softly.

I released my hold and she immediately took my hand and together we started to undo the buttons on my jeans. She pulled them down and I stepped out. I waited for her return but instead of rising I watched and felt as her teeth and tongue nipped and stroked through my silk panties. Immediately my hand went to the back of her head, coaching her, praising her. I felt her hands work up my legs, with careful strokes. She pulled back and looked up into my eyes.

"I can taste you through these," she said, letting the thin band snap against my hip as she pulled and released it. I felt my body quiver at the recoil of the elastic. "You taste divine."

My hand reached down and stroked her face. "Taste me some more. Please. Taste me Will."

She growled and I felt her grip me by my ass, bringing me into her mouth. Her nails dug into my flesh and I found myself gripping the back of her head, wanting more but enjoying the current game far too much to let it end yet. When her tongue eased over my shrouded clitoris I held my breath and she stopped. She looked up with a mischievous grin.

"I found it," she chuckled. Without delay she went immediately back to the spot. Releasing one of my cheeks, she used the hand to press the material tight against my skin as her tongue started to dance.

That did it. I couldn't stand anymore and it took everything I had but I moved away from her. I collapsed on the bed, breathing hard with a raging fire inside me. My hands went down to my center and I pulled the panties from my body.

She didn't finish the sentence. I grabbed her by the shirt and kissed her pulling her into the bed. I rolled her over with ease and held her arms above her head. I expected a protest but instead I felt her head rise up and her lips lay claim to my nipple that hung over her face. I released my hold, which was enough for her to get her arms back. She pulled my head back by burying her fingers into my hair and tugging. As a result I felt my cleavage protrude further, offering her more. God I never wanted anyone the way I wanted her at that moment. She owned me. I was hers and I had to prove it. I broke away and slid off the bed. Without wasting a moment, I threw both her legs over my shoulders. She tried half-heartedly to issue a protest but once she felt my tongue lapping at her it was put to rest.

Instead she began to grind her hips against my face, making the noises I knew all too well. This house has thin walls. I could tell - she was close. It was just a matter of time. I pulled way slightly and let my fingers take over which resulted in a host of new sounds I'd never heard before. All of them were a godsend to my ears and put a smile on my glistening face.

My passion overrode my lack of experience but it's not as if I'm a total stranger to a woman's body. I've had a woman's body for years myself I figured. I knew how I like to be touched. So I gave Will what I thought she'd desire. I plunge two fingers inside her and I hear her sigh in relief and desire all at once, her bucking never stopping.

I did as she asked and it was just a matter of moments before the bucking stopped and her back arched, toes curled. I grinned. I made her toes curl.

I didn't have much time to reflect though. I felt my body pulled back onto the bed and she propped me up so I was on all fours. She settled herself behind me and pulled us both up and into a knelling position. I watched as her hand snaked around, her fingers dragging through my wetness. I turned slightly and watched as she licked her fingers one by one, making satisfied noises. The result was a ragged sigh that I couldn't contain. She went back again and I felt myself reach back, grabbing hold of her head and a fist full of blazing hair. This time instead of claiming my wetness for myself she painted my areola with it. I watched as her fingers made circles around the tip.

I felt her chuckle against me. "Oh it certainly feels good. No question about it. But that's not the reason."

She went back and did it again and I struggled to keep up the conversation. "Then why?"

"After I make you come and you're spent and I've licked every drop from you. All I have to do is suck on this nipple and taste you all over again."

I shuddered. She reached down and felt a new wetness had arrived. I never felt as wanton in my entire life.

"Wet again?" she asked as she stroked me. This time her hand didn't leave. Her fingers continued their maddening pace and I felt her other hand reach up to caress and squeeze my breasts. After a few moments I couldn't stay upright and I fell face first into the mattress. I started to rise but she kept me in place with a gentle hand on my back. "Even better," she whispered.

She replaced her fingers with her tongue and when I felt her slip inside me I thought I might actually pass out. As she danced across my sex I felt her hands go to work, twisting my nipples as her tongue gave me a lashing I'd never forget. My own body began to move against her and I felt her take her lips away. I whimpered in protest but soon I felt three fingers plunged inside me as her other hand danced across my engorged clit.

She took her hand away from my clit and I felt her move against my backside. The next sensation was her own wetness as she spread her lips across me.

"Come on baby," I heard her call out. "Come on and buck for me again. Make me feel it Buf."

I honestly thought for a moment that my body might actually be on fire. But to tell the truth I didn't care. I felt her hands return to me and I was lost. I gave her exactly what she wanted. I could tell by her own cries above me, along with a list of obscenities she muttered that only made me wetter, she was on fire too. I'd had passionate nights over the years and although I thought I knew what fucking was all about. I was sadly mistaken. Willow was fucking me. Good and hard. Fast and furious. I wanted it. I needed it and I found myself crying out for it as my body began to shake.

My words fueled her even more. Her arm had to be killing her at this point but she gave me everything I asked for. Everything I wanted. God, she always gave me everything… for many years now. And finally she was showing me. That pushed me over the edge, the thought of her love and her devotion. I gripped the sheets as my orgasm tore through my body, rattling me to the core. Quickly I felt Willow stop and push between my legs. Her head nestled beneath me. She did just what she said she would. She drank from me making my body spasm even more with every delicate lick and suck she administered.

I couldn’t stay upright. I rolled over and collapsed, trying to remember how to breathe. It was the most intense sexual experience I felt in my life. But it was more than that. I was in love. Truly in love.

I felt her come up and snuggle up to me. I couldn't get the stupid grin off my face. I looked over. I felt better to know I wasn't the only one wearing one. I reached out and stroked her cheek and I felt her go back to the nipple, the one she 'basted' earlier and suck on it tenderly. She made yummy sounds, which made me giggle for some reason. And when she came back to me I pushed her sweat soaked hair out of her face.

"Don't worry about then," she told me. "Just think about now. And now, we've got all night." I felt her begin to kiss my neck again and I just closed my eyes savoring the closeness.

But that was last night. Today was different and as I feel her snuggling into my neck I realize one component is different. I pull away and I get a wounded look.

"Dawn and Xander are downstairs. I came up to tell you before I got … sidetracked." I look down and see my open robe and quickly I pull it together, retying it.

"Oh, I didn't hear them come in," she said rising from the bed, going to the back of the door to get her own robe. "Did you tell them about last night?"

"Dawn yes. Xander no." Come on Will. Say something here. Don't look at me that way. "I had to tell Dawn. She thought I had a guy up here."

"Nope, no guys up here," Willow grinned as she pulled me into her arms. "Just us grrls," she growls, as she nipped at my neck. Willow immediately feels me tense up at her touch. Slowly she pulls away…"Why do I have the overwhelming fear that this where you tell me last night was all a big mistake and we should stick to being friends?"

Willow waves me off. "Hey don't worry about it. I take women to bed like this all the time."

Willow gets a ridiculous look on her face. "No not really! I was being sarcastic! I happen to be in love here Buffy." I look to the door nervously and she reads it. "Oh don't worry," she says softer. "I won't say anything to Xander but I would like to know how to approach Dawn with all of this."

"I told her the truth," I begin. "I told her I'm scared. Okay? Is that so hard to understand?"

Willow sighs and takes me by the hands leading me to the bed. We sit on the edge and she clears her throat. "Calmly. Rationally. What are you scared about? Did I frighten you with anything I did physically last night?"

"No," I answer feeling a blush creep up as I add, "I really liked it…all of it…So no, that's not it."

"What about you?" I don't know what to say. I don't know how I can explain it to Willow so she would understand. Hell, I didn't quite understand it myself yet. "Please…Talk to me," she adds when I say nothing.

"I'm not sure Will. I just…I got close and I freaked. You know how I get. I always feel like this when I get into something new. I shouldn't have to tell you this."

"Well yeah sometimes you freak…Okay you always do but this is different." Willow pauses a moment but starts to grin. "I think it's time to change masks for a moment." I watch as she gives a slight shake and resettles herself on the bed. "This new person in your life, how do you feel about her?"

I can't believe she's doing this – playing the 'best friend' again. "This is crazy. You can't talk about yourself in the third person Will."

"She cute?" she says quickly. I watch as Willow's eyebrows go up and down mischievously and I have to grin. Willow sits cross-legged on the bed, situating her robe before patting the corner inviting me to sit down for a girl-to-girl talk. I realize that she is going to do this regardless of my protests so I might as well play along.

"No she's not cute. She's beautiful. Inside and out." I tell her as I too take a similar position on the bed facing her.

I chuckle and shake my head. The woman's insane but I love her anyway. "Well I'm crazy about her too. I'm just worried."

"Why does the thought of being with her worry you? Is it the whole gay issue because I gotta admit being straight is really overrated?"

"No it's nothing like that," I shake my head. "Well, maybe a little. I mean, I always identified myself as the straight girl in the group. Okay, the straight, 'normal' girl, despite the Slayer thing. Because you gotta admit, most of Xander's girlfriends are just plain weird on some level."

"Well let's evaluate for a moment. She's cute, you're crazy about her, you're not sure about the lesbian thing but you can work through it?"

I get up and I start to pace. "I love her. I really do. And it's been ages since I really loved anything or anyone. Last time…last time was Angel…and that ended badly…I wanted something I would never have. And I think part of me feels that this will end the same way. But there's something else too…something that worries me…she loved someone years ago."

"No…I mean I know she'll always have a special place in her heart but I think she's moved on… But after this woman died, things got a little…crazy for her…She didn't deal with the loss very well…I think part of me is worried about that too…You know being the Slayer means I face everyday knowing it could be my last. What happens if I die and she wigs out again?"

"Well, maybe she's older and wiser. Maybe she knows in advance what she's getting into and what's at stake? Maybe she realizes she's got responsibilities larger than her love life. Eight years is a long time - she's probably grown up since then. Why don't you give her a little credit?"

"I just don't want to make plans with her and have them unfulfilled. I think that's really it deep down. I don't want to make her promises I might not live to keep."

Willow gives me a half-grin. "I think we figured it out," she tells me. The best friend is gone now, replaced with the new lover she's become. She gets off the bed and pulls me into a hug. Something let's loose inside me and I feel myself start to cry. The last 24 hours have been a roller coaster of sorts.

"Buffy listen to me okay?" she whispers into my ear as she continues to hold me. "It's okay to make plans. It's okay to look to the future. And I promise, I swear on your mother's grave, I won't get all veiny should anything happen to you, okay?" She pulls back slightly and I wipe my eyes giving her a nod. "I know the risks going into this. I do. I accept them. I just wish that you could accept them too. I mean…do you think you could try? Because I really want to build a life with you…Or I should say, I want to continue building the life we have because truth be known…we've already been doing it for years…We're just finally opening our eyes to all the possibilities of co-habitation," she grins.

I gave a sigh before squaring my shoulders. "Ready to go downstairs and tell Xander?"

"I'm not sure if I'm ready for all the lewd jokes this morning that an outright confession will bring. Let's just act natural - New natural, not 'old' natural. See what he says. You said Dawn knows right? If I kiss you we won't give the girl a heart attack?"

"Good, I'm glad. I wasn't sure how she'd take it… I don't care about too many peoples opinions but I did care about hers so that's good to hear…Okay, shall we?" Willow says opening the door.

I walk over and I give her the lightest of kisses. As I pull back, I stroke her face. "Thank you," I whisper.

"For showing me last night," I grin bashfully before continuing. "For having the courage to love me. For showing me it's okay to look forward to tomorrow. I don't think you realize how much I truly love you."

"Oh I realize," Willow grins. "And believe me, you can show me all over again tonight."

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Making Plans

By CN Winters

Cnwinters@hotmail.com